When I was in my twenties, a close friend suggested that I would do anything for a dare. While I'd like to think this is still true in essence, I tend to take up fewer of the touching-the-police-officer-on-the-pants-type challenges, and concentrate my efforts on the more sedentary, less going-to-jaily ones.
Like this one, from my friend Chrys Stevenson:
All right then:
There once was a Mr J Sesquipedalian:
Quite an unusual sort of a bloke.
He never (unlike every other Australian)
Shortened the phrases and words that he spoke.
In fact, this young gentleman always preferred,
No matter what topic was being discussed,
To use the most lengthy and tiresome word;
He could think of, which left all his listeners nonplussed.
“You seem a bit aggro this arvo” said one
Of his colleagues. “Indeed it would seem,” replied he;
“The horizon of my basal exasperation;
Has been somewhat broadened, postprandially”.
He thought, “My loquacity’s commonly known
For the air of ingeniousness that it lends.”
But alas, on this point he was sadly alone:
He had many more syllables than he had friends.